Would anyone like to
invest in my brain? Here is a sampling of some recent ideas, of varying
cost and feasibility:
1. Eliminate the letter
ÒCÓ from the English language, so that hard Cs are replaced by ÒKÓ
and soft Cs ÒSÓ; add a letter
or symbol, such as an apostrophe, to the letter ÒHÓ for the ÒCHÓ
sound. Kan you do the
kankan danse by kikking your legs and flounsing your skirt?
2. Sell Platonic ballet
flats for $50. Why is it that all cheap ballet flats are weirdly perverted, with
non-functional bow-ties
or comically round toes? Repettos obviously do not cost $200 to make.
3. Make umbrellas in two
different handle heights, so that walking down the street on a rainy
day is 50% less likely
to result in an umbrella showdown.
4. Publish a book of
photographs taken from Facebook, with my funny comments underneath;
IÕm pretty sure my best
medium is internet parasitism and this would provide a more permanent
showcase.
